Sunday, May 1, 2011

To Bidet or Not to Bidet

I really want a bidet.  One in my house.  One in every public restroom I must use.  One in every hotel or motel room.  If you are the typical American reading this blog, your initial thought is probably, "WTF!"  If you have any sort of chronic intestinal inflammation and think "WTF!" then you have never used a  bidet.  After you have used one, you will better understand why I want them to be more widespread.

As a Crohn's sufferer, I have to run to the bathroom a lot.  I use A LOT of toilet paper.  I don't care HOW high quality your toilet paper is, there is a limited amount of times you can wipe your bum before it really starts to hurt.  After the hurting starts, it only gets worse.  I had just chalked the wiping raw of my rear end to be part of life dealing my Crohn's.

I was in Asia and asking a Korean friend if he had any toilet paper when I first realized that a lot of other countries either don't supply or use toilet paper.  Instead they give you a stream of warm water to clean yourself with. My Korean friend made me aware of this as he handed me some toilet paper. Like most in America, he couldn't fathom touching his rear end after doing a number two -- even if it was to clean.  Now me, my rear end was already hurting from the multiple bathroom trips that day and the toilet paper he handed me was more like wax paper than anything else.  I decided to take a chance.  I figured, "What the hell, I am going to wash my hands with soap and water afterwards."  All I know is that it felt A LOT better to use the warm stream of water than the wax paper on my butt.

From that point forward, when given the choice, I used the warm water to clean myself rather than toilet paper.  Going to the bathroom wasn't as difficult, cumbersome, or uncomfortable as it had been just a week prior.  

Now...where is my bidet?

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